Keys to a successful marriage

This is another video “script.”

What is the key to a successful marriage?

A good marriage is built on understanding – you need to know your spouse’s good points and bad points. You then need to focus on the good points. That nice feeling you get when you think about how kind, caring and wonderful your spouse is, and how this kind, caring, wonderful person married a bum like me, this feeling is called love. Growing in love is the key to a successful marriage.

A bad marriage is also built on understanding: when you know your spouse’s good points and bad points, and then focus on the bad points. If you think too much about how he squeezes the toothpaste tube in the middle and doesn’t fold it up neatly from the bottom, or how she is costing you a fortune because she never turns off the lights when she leaves a room – this would be the opposite of love. Growing out of love is the best way to ruin a marriage.

Whether or not your marriage is good or bad is entirely up to you. Your obligation is to know your spouses’ good and bad points and then focus on the good, find more good, and constantly identify her with her goodness.

[If you think a good marriage is yours by right, and you expect her to look for your goodness (which is obviously in abundance), and she will never appreciate you enough (because you are obviously so amazing) – your love will fizzle and you marriage will end in ruins.]

A good marriage doesn’t happen by accident just because you deserve it, you will have a good marriage because you realize that it is your obligation to constantly rediscover how amazing the person you married is.

Spend five minutes once a week thinking about another one of your spouses’ good points. Write it down. At the end of the year you will have 52 more reasons why you love her. Write them all down in a card and give it to her on your anniversary.

Your marriage will be golden.

July 19th, 2007 General, Marriage/Relationships