Shwarma
More Torah fans! What happened? Where have I been? I am at the airport in beautiful, sunny Milwaukee. It is time to get back to business and update the More Torah site.
Epiphany! Someone commented on a More Torah blog post about Shwarma. Here is an excerpt:
I always feel so sorry for the Jews who lost so much of their own culture and culinary traditions throughout their 2000 year exile that in modern times they had to resort to copying arabs and other middle eastern cultures in order to even begin to have anything like native cuisine in Israel.
You can read the whole thing, I can’t tell if it is anti-Semitic, political, whatever, or both. But that isn’t the point. The bottom line is that the opinion about Shwarma is somewhat correct. Ultimately shwarma is a Jewish adaptation of non-Jewish Middle Eastern food. It is the food equivalent of Yiddish or Klezmer. And that is cool. But there is an exclusively Jewish food.
Chulent.
Yikes. Why promote a hybrid? Promote a Jewish original.
This Shabbos I had three different Chulents. I had one Friday night, one at Kiddush on Shabbos morning, and a third at Shabbos lunch. I am a changed man. True, I nearly OC-ed (over chulented). True, I am a lot heavier today. And true, my stomach is rumbling. But that is all part of the beauty of chulent.
Chulent is a Jewish original. It is pasty. It is love.
Maybe it is the new Shwarma.
February 21st, 2010
I spent three days in LA and ate a lot.
First encounter: I was starving by the time I got to my hotel. I was told to visit Nagila. Nagila is really two places. The left side is dairy and the right side is meat. I went to the right. I ordered shwarma. It was good. It makes sense that the shwarma was good. LA is a major city. It has a large Jewish population. It attracts a large number of Israelis. It obviously has a decent shwarma joint. I was pleased because my shwarma experience was authentic – French fries were stuffed in the sandwich (not as a side dish), and no silly American gimmicks like lettuce. It was good, not very messy – it was wrapped in a type of wax paper and held together with a piece of masking tape! (I have never seen that before) – and it didn’t sit in my stomach like a lump. If you are in LA and need shwarma, I recommend Nagila.
Next: I ate three times at Jeff’s Gourmet Sausage. What a treat. Allan was the first person to take me there. I decided to eat light because I had a second dinner planned for later that night. I ordered the Smoked Chicken and Apple Sausage. It was good although it was basically just a fancy hot dog – I was expecting more. Someone had hyped it and I was expecting my mouth to do back flips. But don’t get me wrong – it was tasty. I also ate most of Allan’s BBQ wings. The wings were served with a white Ranch Sauce. It tasted like treif – wow – very good.
Later that night I went out with my Persian posse. We started late and most of the restaurants were closed, so we went back to Jeff’s. I ordered the spicy wings (different from the BBQ wings, which were more tangy). Wow! And you should know – I am not a wings guy. I don’t usually order wings or go out my way to find them. But these were good. Hot. Spicy. Tasted like treif. And they were messy! I had to wash my hands and face before I could talk to anyone.
The next day I had a meeting in Beverly Hills. We ordered lunch from Pat’s. I had a salmon salad. After all the wings, sausage, and shwarma I wanted light. The salad came with mango, funky dressing, and an awesome chunk of grilled salmon.
I was busy the rest of the day (I didn’t only eat in LA). Late that night I went back to Jeff’s and got a Pastrami Burger. Jeff’s was three-for-three. The burger was great. I didn’t waste my time eating French fries – and this is a good thing – I wasn’t so stuffed that I couldn’t move.
LA was a great trip and I want to express my sincerest thanks to the cows that gave their lives in order to make my experience worthwhile.
May 21st, 2009
There is another site on the web making the world a better place with shwarma! Shwarma will bring us together.
In other news, Obama is in Israel right now – the true test of his worth as a candidate will be whether or not he gets a shwarma. My guess is he won’t. Friends of Israel should note this lapse and vote accordingly.
July 22nd, 2008
Yes, this is radical. On my recent trip to Israel I made a number of obligatory stops at Maoz for shwarma. As usual, Maoz was in top form and the shwarmas were tasty and transcendent.
But I noticed something unusual in the tray of shwarma add-ons. Next to the hummus, pickles, and Israeli salad was shredded cabbage. I don’t recall ever seeing this as an option before. I admit that maybe cabbage is available with shwarma in America – but Americans are known to put lettuce in their shwarma as well (and that is weird) so I never really took it seriously – but cabbage at Maoz?
I tried it and wow – it was pickled and added just enough zest and tang to be noticed, but it was not gross or overpowering – the awesomeness of the magic shwarma was enhanced.
Innovative – you better believe it.
June 6th, 2008
I have never been particularly environmentally aware (pro or con) – I just like that global warming could turn Boston into San Diego. But according to this, it seems that the global warming activists are really just at war with “manliness,” and possibly meat eating, which could mean ultimately an outright attack on shwarma. If this is true then I may take up arms and join the polluting, SUV driving, Right Guard spraying masses. There is only so far you can push someone before he snaps.
March 18th, 2007
Sorry for the delay, I have been on the move these last few weeks.
I went to Maoz shwarma for the final leg of my great shwarma challenge and I ordered the standard lafa (is there really anything else?). I had it prepared the way I like it, with hummus, fries, pickles, tichina and a touch of charif. The meat is flavored in a special way – not spicy, but in no way bland – and it is cooked to perfection (and as all good shwarma lovers know, it is best to get at the end of the day, when the meat is blackened from cooking for hours). The chips (fries) are not greasy at all. I ate the shwarma slow and did my best to savor every bite, it was delicious.
I have tried them all and Maoz is king. While in Israel I asked around – cabbies, bus drivers, locals (only native Hebrew speakers obviously) and I was surprised to find that they all know about Maoz and they all love it. There are no gimmicks at Maoz (and also very few Americans). Maoz is a serious place for people who love shwarma and expect the best – no games, no fried onions, no ketchup, no napkins – just real shwarma (a little slice of heaven if you ask me).
Maoz is on King George Street in Jerusalem, easy to find and you can talk most bus drivers into dropping you off right in front. If you want my expert opinion, Moaz is the perfect shwarma – I have not found better.
Unfortunately, I overdid it and OSed (over shwarma-ed). All good shwarmas stay with you for a day or too (no, there is no such thing as a “health” shwarma – the concept is oxymoronic) and after one shwarma too many I nearly did myself in. Friday night, the day after my Maoz shwarma, I found myself in incredible pain and running franticly through the streets of the Old City. I spent most of the night with chills and a fever and my eyes watered, but I survived.
I would have taken a break from shwarma, but I have a big mouth and there too many people who want to eat shwarma with me. Two nights after my OS near death experience I was talked into going back for another shwarma. Two of my students actually fought for the right to pay for me (Julia asked first, so I gave her the honors). I went with a group of about 15 to Maoz and we all ordered shwarmas (one person ordered a falafel – I was embarrassed for her and told her so). I was afraid to order a full shwarma (because of the Friday night OS fiasco) so I did the unthinkable and got a half lafa. I was pleasantly surprised – it was all the joys of a full shwarma without the pain.
I am back in Boston and now that I have silenced the beginner-shwarma-upstarts, I can finally take a much needed break and let my body recover.
Special thanks goes again to Julia for paying for my second Maoz shwarma. Also thanks to Julie – although she didn’t get to buy my shwarma, her heart was in the right place.
June 26th, 2006
I went to Massov Burger, the much venerated and oft hyped shwarma joint near Jerusalem’s central bus station (and spelled Massov and not Maasov like I misspelled it in my previous post).
I ordered the standard laffa (the basic shwarma) and I had it prepared the way I like it, with humus, pickles, “chips”, tichina, and a little bit of charif.
The Massov shwarma is good – the meat is high quality, but not flavored or spiced, and the chips are very oily (not a bad thing, just an observation). It is a fine shwarma, but not the “world’s only shwarma” like certain upstart shwarma-wannabes say it is.
Massov also has a lot of gimmicks. They have a super size shwarma, an option to have onions fried on the grill and added to your shwarma, a fifty-fifty shwarma/schnitzel sandwich, ketchup, and even napkins. Many American’s go to Massov and I think these gimmicks are a major part of their draw.
My conclusion: Massov makes a decent shwarma and the dining experience is pleasurable (they will even take your picture and post it on the wall). It is a good place to send a beginner. The beginner will be impressed with the gimmicks (as I think my over-confident, over-zealous young friends were) and can brag about the huge shwarma they ate.
On Thursday I am going back to Maoz and will hopefully post my report soon after that.
A special thanks goes out to Mickey, a great Tzaddik and lover of truth, for sponsoring my Massov Burger shwarma.
June 13th, 2006
As you may be aware, I am acknowledged as one of the world’s foremost shwarma authorities. (Search for “shwarma” on Google, my name almost always comes up on the first page, many times at the top). I have sampled many shwarmas from all over the world and I have been doing this for many years. My expert opinion is that Maoz, on King George Street in Jerusalem, makes the best shwarma.
Recently, a number of young upstarts (yes Joel, you in particular) have had the audacity to challenge my wisdom and experience and claim that Maasov Burger, near Jerusalem’s Central Bus Station, is the best. I am well aware of Maasov. I ate my first shwarma there and I have eaten there many times. It is indeed a delicious, albeit very greasy, shwarma (though I admit, a lot of grease is aesthetically very pleasing). But once I experienced Maoz there was no turning back. Maoz is not only a cleaner, less greasy shwarma, but the meat is spiced in a special way that I have never experienced anywhere else.
I am going back to Israel tomorrow. In the interest of ending this debate and for the betterment of shwarma eating people everywhere, I am going to go to both Maasov and Maoz. I will decide once and for all what the best shwarma is. If I can figure out how to blog from Israel I will post my findings as they unfold.
Be a part of this big Mitzvah – let me know if you are interested in sponsoring a shwarma.
June 4th, 2006
